On one of my very ‘off days’ and on my way to contribute to Proctor & Gamble sponsorship for life – purchasing female hygienic products – it occurred to me. “Why are female bodily changes, like period, pregnancy and menopause, paired with pain or inconvenience and male changes with pleasure? Not fair.” Or, like my grandma used to say: “If there is a God. he sure hates women to put them trough agony like that!”
Yes I admit. I am a bit jealous of men who get an erection paired with an orgasm almost on automatic pilot. Before most women get a good orgasm they must rely on their man to have read quite a deal of female magazines with tutorials “How To Satisfy Her”, some reliable Do It Yourself (DIYOrgasM) or be blessed with a fantastic lover. That’s how we have become such professionals in faking. If faking an orgasm would be part of a Hollywood audition, we all would be super stars by now.
So I am imagining a world where every woman who is ovulating, is getting a small orgasm. When the egg is done, no pain and suffering. No psychological husband and boyfriend bashing because it is just that time of the month. Nothing. Peace. But instead our body is celebrating the birth of yet again a new egg! We are fertile and that calls upon a celebration with an ‘orgasm light’. A woman’s personal little pleasure that is felt inside, and leaves a sudden glow of horny happiness on the outside.
Besides. Having an orgasm light whilst ovulating also suits a biological purpose. Since there is much more clarity about women being in their most fertile moment compared to some vague signs at present like, shiny skin and hair. Who on earth picks up on those vague signs? I know I don’t when looking in the mirror. Bring ‘m on those orgasms light whilst I still have some eggs popping out.
… And I pick again the same old hygienic products – as always, talk about brand loyalty! – and put them on the counter for my contribution to Proctor & Gamble. Period.
Photography: Nick Knight – Flora